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Spring Q & A with Kay

Coffee Time with Kay
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April 17, 2020

Hi gals! I thought it was about time I answered some of those questions I requested from you a couple of months ago. Ha! Better late than never, I say. In fact, I think I’ve decided to make these Q&As a quarterly feature. That might keep me on my toes a little and provide a regular forum for the questions some of you send my way occasionally.

Spring Q & A WITH KAY

My absolute favorite thing about blogging is the community we’ve managed to build here at Dressed for My Day. I love the way you gals frequently comment on my posts, asks questions and even respond to each other’s comments. Keep it up! And if I don’t reply to your comment, it’s probably just because I had an overwhelming amount of comments the day before and replied to those, and thus I need to take a day off from that and only respond to direct questions. But you can know that I read and enjoy each and every comment.

I’m also always game to answering your questions and providing helpful information when you email me. Since I’m going to make these Q&A columns a quarterly affair, please let me know in your email if you need a quick answer or if you’re supplying a query for an upcoming Q&A post. Today’s questions arrived in my email inbox a couple of months ago, I’m ashamed to say. But most of them were still relevant, so let’s get started!

Q1 –  I would love to know what makeup application pitfalls to avoid so I don’t look even older.

Well, I’m no makeup artist, and I don’t feel like I always get this right myself, but I can absolutely provide a few helpful makeup application suggestions for the older woman – ahem. But because I try not to wag my finger when I write, I think I’ll suggest a few positive pointers rather than pointing out pitfalls. How’s that?

  • Either accentuate your eyes or your mouth, but not both. So if you go heavy on your eye shadow and mascara and liner, use a softer, neutral lip color, and vice versa.
  • Frame your eyes by filling in and shaping your brows. This is so important. Full brows are a sign of youth, so when we fill in our brows a bit with a shadow or pencil, we’ll naturally look a little more youthful. I use this Urban Decay Double Down Brow powder application and it works nicely for me. The Taupe Trap is billed as a “universally flattering” shade combination.
  • Go light on the eyeliner. At this point I only line the very edges of my upper lid and under the top lid in the waterline. I wouldn’t suggest lining your waterline with just any pencil. I use the Dior Long-Wear Waterproof Eyeliner Pencil and it’s very soft.
  • Apply blush to the tops of your cheekbones only. As we age, our cheeks begin to sag and we lose structure there. So you definitely don’t want to apply blush or rouge to your entire cheek. If you apply some color just to the tops and then blend, you’ll create a little structure.
  • Blend, blend, blend. Speaking of blending, this is probably the most common mistake I find among women of all ages. Gals, we need to blend our eye shadow, blend in our blush and definitely blend any contouring you use. Even your foundation needs to be well blended along the edges. That’s why I love the Beauty Blender. I use it to blend my foundation for a flawless finish.
  • Take the time. The other mistake I see most frequently, especially among older women, is simply not taking the time to get makeup application right. Make an appointment with a makeup consultant at your local department store or your Mary Kay representative. Learn how to apply a look you’re comfortable with and then take the necessary time each day (or however often you apply makeup) to get it right.

Let me know if you have more specific questions about makeup application. Also, next week I’ll be sharing my current daily makeup routine and all the products I’m using.

Q2 – I can’t wear heels and don’t always want to wear sneakers, but what shoes should I wear that are both comfortable and pretty? I’m on my feet all day with children and retail work, so I need my shoes to be comfortable. But I want them to look pretty, too.

I hear you. And you’re not alone. So many of my readers have real feet “issues” of various kinds that prevent you from wearing heels. And look, I don’t have any of those issues…yet…but I still don’t want to wear heels all the time.

But gals, there are some great options out there. Nordstrom has an entire section of comfort shoes in its listings, for instance. And there are some great looking shoes in that list of over 5,000 styles.

top left: Naturalizer Banks Slingback Pump // bottom right: Sarto Slingback Flat

Fortunately flats are trending right now, especially in pointy toes and squared off toes (perfect for those of you who don’t want your toes scrunched, too). If you’re going for a dressy look with, say, a dress or skirt, definitely look for either a kitten heel (also trending), a square short heel (like those above) or a flat with a pointy toe, if you can wear it. That will look the dressiest. Otherwise, look for the trending square toe and you’ll look current. Of course, ballet flats are still and will always be perfectly acceptable, too.

top right: Birdies Starling Leather Flat // bottom left: AGL cap toe ballet flat

Both of the flats above are perfect to wear with jeans, dress pants, skirts and even dresses. I hear these brands are extremely comfortable. Yes, they’re pricey (the AGL is on sale!), but they’re so versatile that they can do the work of four pairs of shoes.

Q3 – Could you address online clothing shopping again sometime? I haven’t fully embraced it yet (for fear of making mistakes or being disappointed) but I suspect I will be shopping online more and more.

You bet! I’ll be providing a full post about online shopping next week. Meanwhile, you might want to review this previous post, which includes a section about online shopping.

5 Shopping Mistakes

Q4 – Can you tell me about the diet program you’re on? Is it expensive?  How does it work?

I started the FASTer Way to Fat Loss in January, 2018, and did two rounds of the 6-week program. FWTFL is a nutrition program first and then a fitness program. It emphasizes eating a balanced diet of protein, carbs and fats, carb cycling, intermittent fasting, building muscle and rest. That may sound complicated, but actually the program helps you simplify your fitness plan so that it becomes a lifestyle rather than a program.

I’ve continued with the FASTer Way to Fat Loss in its monthly membership program, through which I receive one-on-one coaching as needed, a portal full of videoed strength and cardio workouts, weekly meal plans, recipes and access to nutritionists. I’m able to do all of my workouts at home, but they also provide gym workouts, too.

In those first two rounds of FWTFL I lost 20 pounds. I’ve kept off 18 of those pounds, and stayed at my same size (I think I’ve gained more muscle as I’ve continued with the program). I really don’t like to push the program, but I am an affiliate, which means I do receive a commission if you sign up for FWTFL through my links. But honestly, I just think FWTFL is so intuitive and works.

If you’d like more information, you can check out their home page, which also provides access to their blog. The blog is full of information about all the components of the FWTFL lifestyle. Oh, and by the way, FWTFL has a program for men, too. If you have questions about specific components of the program, I’m glad to answer them. And you can find out more about my experience with the program in these previous posts:

Q5 – Are tees with knots in front still in style?

tie front tee // twist front top

Yes, they are! The reason this silhouette of tee works so well is because it provides us gals a way to leave our shirts untucked but still have it cinched a bit at the waist. So it doesn’t look as sloppy as a plain, unfitted t-shirt hanging out. In fact, it creates a very feminine silhouette. Here are a few I found currently. This top basically accomplishes the results of a front tuck without the fuss.

I actually prefer the twist front shirts over the tie or knot fronts simply because sometimes the little knot can be a little unwieldy and stick out. Also, I find it best to wear these shirts with high rise jeans or pants, otherwise your midriff can show.

Q6 – I’m interested in the paper bag waist tapered pants that are trending. I’d like to know which body types can wear these pants.

I’ve actually been looking for a pair of paperbag waist pants to share in a blog post, but just haven’t yet found some that I like the style and the price. (I just ordered these today, so we’ll see.) Unfortunately I’m finding more wide leg paperbag waist pants these days, and I don’t think I (or you gals) would like those as much as the more tapered leg you mentioned in your questions.

Mid-Rise Straight Leg Paperbag Cropped Denim Pants I just ordered. We’ll see!

Meanwhile, I suggest these for women with either a defined waist or a straight waist, but not for women with a protruding waistline. Second these work best for women with even proportions or those with a long torso. They can help create more balanced proportions for the woman with a long torso because they’re usually high waisted. But the woman with long legs and a short torso should probably steer clear of these or she’ll look like her pants come up to her arm pits.

You’ll have to tuck your shirt into the paperbag waist pants, of course. But you can wear either a fitted top or a more blousy one, depending on your body shape and distinctions.

Q7 –  I am wondering if you have fashion advice as to how and with what I can wear white patent leather flat shoes? The shoes are beautiful, casual, classy, kind of moccasin flats. Photo included.

I happen to have a pair of white flats, too, but mine are pointy toed. And, honestly, I sometimes struggle with how to wear them as well. I think that’s because they are soooo visible. Ha! So I’ve determined you just have to put them on a wear them! You have to accept that they are a bit of a fashion statement and be okay with that. But you can learn how to make them look more incorporated into your total look so they don’t “stick out.”

Plaid Blazer and Black Crop Pants for the Office
See more of this post.

The photo above is the most current way I’ve worn my white flats. As you can see, I paired them with black crop pants, a pink tee and a plaid blazer. The tie-in is the plaid blazer with some white or cream in it.

Also, as trivial as it may seem, I think the white rimmed sunglasses help tie this look together. Of course, you wouldn’t wear sunglasses all day, but the principle is to wear a little white at the top of your outfit to balance the white in your footwear. So maybe add a white necklace, t-shirt, earrings or scarf.

Snake Print Trucker Jacket
See more of this post.

Interestingly, the only other time I’ve shown these shoes here on Dressed for My Day that I can find, I styled them with black jeans. Just goes to show, the color of the pants doesn’t matter nearly as much as what you bookend the look with at the top. Here, the snakeprint jacket and blush blouse balance the white shoes. Make sense?

Q8 – Can you do a future post with ideas for the 40+ crowd on business casual/smart casual outfits for work? If you’ve already done a past post on this topic, would you mind sending me a link to the post? 

I can absolutely put together a future post around this topic. But meanwhile, I suggest you check out these posts for casual spring work looks. Of course, I’m assuming you may be working from home now. Hmm. But when you return to the office…and you will!..some of these might inspire you.

I think black and white is always a great combo for the office. These black pants would be very versatile for work. (Today you can get them up to 50% off, with the purchase of any 3+ items.)

Let's spend the day together!
See more of this post.

During the spring and summer especially, white jeans or pants with a pretty red blazer would be perfect for a more casual office. I shared 7 ways to style this combo in a recent post.

Black with white polka dots
See more of this recent post.

I love my white linen blazer for adding a little class to spring and summer styles.

white linen blazer
See more of this post.

Adding a plaid blazer to black pants or even jeans is another great way to make an outfit office-ready.

See more of this look.

The cropped pants shown below may or may not be appropriate for your office, but the white popover blouse would be a must for me if I worked outside my home. (Part of the 50% off 3+ items deal.)

Crop chinos to Wear Soon
See more of this post.

Well, unfortunately I’m going to have to stop there or this post will be too long for anyone to read. Tell you what, I’ll do another one of the Q&As next week. It will be Spring Q&A Part 2. Ha! So if you have additional spring or summer related fashion, beauty or fitness questions, send them in. Label them Q&A so I’ll know they’re for the post and not for immediate response.

I hope you enjoyed today’s Q&A. I really did. Thanks so much for reading along. And send me those questions!

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Blessed for My Day

While I’m oh so grateful that we serve a risen Savior, I don’t want to forget that we also have a crucified one. He died so that we might live. Let’s never take that for granted. Let’s never forget the sacrifice He made.

Today may we live in the light of the cross, Christ crucified for our sins. And may we appropriate that sacrifice, refusing to live under the weight of shame or regret. If you are struggling with shame or regret for past mistakes, confess that to Him today, thank Him for dying for your sin, accept that the penalty has been paid in full and rejoice in your newfound freedom and joy.

For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. ~ 1 Corinthians 1:18

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xoxo, Kay
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9 thoughts on “Spring Q & A with Kay

  1. Kay, thank you for addressing each of these questions. Two of them were also my questions and two were questions I wish I had asked. All answers were super helpful!

  2. Thanks for the Q&A post. You addressed questions that I had and a few that escaped me. All of your ideas and answers are doable and practical.
    Kay, thanks for the BFMD post also.
    Enjoy your weekend.
    Suzanne

  3. Thanks for the Q & A posts too. I found them helpful! But I do have one ‘burning’ question.. HOW do you achieve that ‘half tucked in’ top look?? I just can’t seem to make it look right. Do you start in the front, do you leave the back out?

  4. About the paper bag waisted pants- you are right about proportions. I’m petite and short-waisted. I DO have a waistline! But these were terrible on me. I have a feeling that these work best on taller ladies. I’m finding that as a petite, there are certain styles that are just never going to work. And I’ve finally stopped fighting it, and I’m figuring out what does work. It’s a process!

  5. Thank you for this post! That outfit with the black pants, nude heels and white blazer is so classy!!
    This was funny. I did a front tuck with one of my shirts last week and my husband literally walked by and untucked it, he said “part of your shirt was tucked in”. It’s suppose to be that way!!! So, maybe the shirts you featured with a knot in them would be better for me! ?

    1. Lol, Kathy, I couldn’t resist chiming in! That’s sounds exactly like what my husband did when I tried it! Like Dana above, I keep trying but never seem to feel like it is right! Glad Kay can give us some tips!

  6. Learning how to bookend a look has added a lot more options to my wardrobe. It’s gives me the opportunity to wear my favorite shoes by repeating the colors in a necklace or scarf at the neck.
    ?Because he lives, I can face tomorrow
    Because he lives, all fear is gone
    Because I know, he holds my future
    Life is worth the living just
    Because he lives?

  7. Kay, You did a great job with answering the questions, while keeping it very honest. ThNk you for all that you do for us! I hope that you’ve had a nice Friday and that you and the family enjoy your weekend. Love BFMD!

  8. Lots of good information. I’ve been eyeing the paper bag waist pants, but suspected they wouldn’t look good on me. While I’m 6’1″ tall, I’m all legs with a very short torso. As you noted, with a tucked in shirt, these would look like they come up to my arm pits. Thanks for saving me from wasting time and money on this look. I would love to hear more about toppers that will work in the heat. I live in Central Florida and we have already had 90+ days. I would like to look classy, but its hard to pull off when you are literally melting. Thanks again for all your posts!

@dressed_4_my_day