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Coffee with Kay – Let’s Talk Christmas

Coffee Time with Kay
December 19, 2020

Happy weekend! Oh, and Merry Christmas! Indeed, as we are now within a week of December 25th, I really like to think of this as Christmas week. Don’t you? I thought today I’d take a break from sharing fashion and beauty tips and we’d just sit and chat a bit. So pour yourself a cup of your favorite winter beverage and let’s talk Christmas.

Coffee with Kay

With the pandemic putting a crimp in our Christmas celebrations, James and I have been trying to enjoy the holiday the best we can. We’re disappointed that being with family just wasn’t even an option for us this Christmas. And we’re missing out on all the holiday parties that we enjoyed attending last year with our church’s life groups, staff and friends. So it’s really been up to us to create our own special moments, just the two of us.

Christmas isn’t really about the parties and gifts and shows and exhibits, of course. And our family’s most meaningful traditions aren’t even tied to those things. But for us, participating in some of those festive gatherings and events each year has always helped us to celebrate the true source of our joy, Jesus.

I liken it to anything else we celebrate. When we celebrate a child’s birthday, a son’s graduation or a daughter’s marriage, we create a joyful event by having yummy food, festive music, gifts, activities that evoke laughter, dancing and photo opportunities. The celebration is not about those things. But those activities and decorations and objects act as little “joy prompters,” if you will.

So yeah, I guess a lot of our joy prompters got cancelled this year. But that just means we have to dig a little deeper and find the joy of the season without all of those things. That kind of feels like being told to “laugh and act happy” at a party without cake and games and gifts.

That would be pretty difficult for a child at a neighborhood birthday party. But we’re not children and Jesus isn’t just a neighbor kid. And that is why, despite the circumstances, I’m actually enjoying this year’s celebration of Christmas. Instead of leaning on parties and platters of fudge to spark the joy, I’ve dug a little deeper and spent more time than usual reflecting on why we celebrate the birth of Christ.

A Question that Led to a Conundrum

I recently asked an influencer I follow on Instagram to share what celebrating Hanukkah means to her. She had been posting about the traditions her family keeps and the historical event it commemorates. So I assumed she would gladly tell me what the holiday means to her personally. But she refused. As in, she told me, “No, I won’t do that.”

I wasn’t put out with her. I still follow her and enjoy her Instagram stories. I was just a little baffled…and sad. I honestly wanted to know about the feelings her Jewish celebration evoked in her. And that prompted me to want to share briefly here what Christmas means to me.

(By the way, one of my readers who is Jewish was kind enough to share her thoughts on Hanukkah in the comments of Monday’s post. It was a very heartfelt response to my curiosity, and I am genuinely grateful that she shared her heart with us there.)


My church didn’t celebrate advent when I was growing up. But in my adult years I’ve become more exposed to the advent celebration and participated in it some years. Advent simply means the arrival of an important event, person or celebration. And many Christians use advent wreaths, candles and readings to help prepare their hearts to celebrate the birth of Jesus, the Christ.

Most advent readings have you light four different candles in the weeks approaching Christmas. The candles are given different meanings, depending on the church’s tradition. But our church and many others light candles for hope, peace, joy and love.

And those four words precisely explain how I feel about Christmas. Indeed, this religious holiday is so much more to me than a tradition. It’s definitely more than the “joy prompters” I mentioned earlier, like gifts and parties and candy and concerts. And it’s more than warm feelings, family moments, acts of kindness or laughter, too. (As much as I enjoy watching Hallmark Christmas movies, it absolutely drives me batty that they assign these sentimental and trivial meanings to Christmas.)

What Christmas Means to Me

For me, Christmas is a reminder that Jesus is everything. He alone is my source for hope, peace, joy and love.


Because Jesus was born, I know that God is a promise keeper. He said He would send a savior and He did. And so I know He will keep His other promises, too.

Because Jesus was born and later died on the cross and rose again, I know that this is not all there is. In this world we have trouble, but Jesus has overcome the world. Therefore, we have hope.

When I get bad news or watch the news, I cling to the hope I have in Jesus.


Jesus is the Prince of Peace. He is our peace. He is the only bridge between us and our Creator. Sin separates us from God, but Jesus reunites us with our Maker through His death on the cross. Jesus affords us peace with our God.

Without peace with our God we cannot have peace within ourselves or peace with others. But because I am at peace with God through Christ, I can live peaceably in this broken world and be at peace with others by giving them the grace, forgiveness and mercy that has been given to me.


I’ve discovered that true joy is only found in Jesus. He is the gift of God to a broken people. Jesus is a promise kept, a triumphant victory, a sweet reunion, a lavish gift and a loving invitation all wrapped into one. What joy!!!


God loved the people He created so much that He lavishly demonstrated that love by sending His one and only Son into the world as a humble baby born in a manger so that Prince could walk among ordinary men and women and then pay the ultimate price for our souls. I would never give my son Daniel to die for you, dear friend. Nope. I wouldn’t do it. But God did that for you and me. Now that is love.

What does Christmas mean to you?

Look, this is a style and beauty blog. And while I do take the occasional Saturday to post an inner beauty post because I believe that true beauty begins within, for the most part I keep this website focused on fairly worldly things.

But I just couldn’t let this season pass without sharing with you, my dear readers, what Christmas means to me. I honestly believe that sharing this could be life-changing for someone. But even if you have just read this post with mild curiosity, that’s quite okay. Many of my usual readers will not even read this post, and that’s totally fine. But I knew I needed…wanted…to share my feelings on this holiday holy day.

And I’d love for you to share with me and other readers what Christmas means to you. And hey, if you celebrate Hanukkah or another tradition, I’d love to hear your thoughts on your celebration, too. If you have graciously read my words, I will certainly read and ponder yours, too. Thank you for reading. God bless you!

Do you have thoughts you’d like to share about today’s topic? I’d love to hear from you today! I tend to take as much time off from work as I can during the weekends, so I may not reply to your comments unless you ask me a direct question. But I’d love for you to carry on this conversation in the comment section below. And you can know for certain that I read and value each and every comment. Please remember that I try to keep this space free from controversy, so let’s stay away from the topic of politics or other divisive issues.

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xoxo, Kay
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32 thoughts on “Coffee with Kay – Let’s Talk Christmas

  1. Thank you for this lovely post! Yes, Jesus is the One who is all these things: Hope, Peace, Joy, Love for everyday and the uncertain future we all are experiencing with this Virus situation. He is my focus these days. Only ‘HE’ can see us through this.

    So Thank You for sharing this great news!

    I also miss dressing up for church events and other parties. But things will get better! I do have faith for improvements to come!

    Have a Blessed Holiday Season!
    Pat, A Colorado Viewer

  2. What a wonderful post Kay! I know that the main reason Larry and I love Christmas is because we fully believe in God, the birth of Jesus, and why He was put on earth. We enjoy seeing the Christmas lights and see them as a symbol of His light. We drove to a town about 30 minutes away last night to drive down Christmas Lane, which is a group of homes where 90% of the people decorate for others to enjoy. So, like you & James, we are doing things to add to our joy and Christmas spirit.

  3. Thank you for this great post! The birth of Jesus is truly the reason that we should celebrate! While my heart is heavy with thoughts of Covid and how it has affected so many, I am thankful for a simple Christmas that allows me to just be still and know that he is truly God and he is still on the throne! Let us all seize this moment and enjoy the wonder of our savior! Blessings to us this Christmas!

  4. Thank you, Kay, for such a meaningful message. I appreciate you as a woman of faith, and that you share your faith with us.
    Without all the extra activities that we usually have this time of year, I have felt I can focus more on the real reason we celebrate, and feel more of God’s peace and joy.
    Blessings to you and your family.

  5. I look forward to your Saturday posts as much as I do the ones on fashion. This is a beautiful Christmas devotion. I get frustrated with the focus on commercialism that seems to gain steam with each year. The only reason that we have Christmas is because Jesus came, lived, died and rose again to reconcile us to a holy God. We, who are so unworthy of so great a demonstration of love. I enjoy our simple family traditions and am thankful that my whole family will be together this year. God wants us to enjoy our lives. For me, I have to take time to sit quietly and reflect on what Christmas is really about, then I can enjoy the fluff as it comes! God is definitely a promise keeper, and that’s where my hope comes from. Trying to comprehend His great love for His creation is mind boggling. As you said, I’m not one who would offer my sons to die, yet God gave us that great Gift. He alone knows the future, He is the only One ultimately in control (thank goodness), and I appreciate devotions like this one that turn our focus to Him.

  6. Dear Kay, Thank you for being so open to share your faith. Seems like at every turn, we are confronted with the godlessness in this world. As Christians, we are lifted up by the hope that comes from our faith in Jesus. Meditating on Christ coming at Christmas, I am inspired to seek more humility. I feel surrounded by the immense love of God who deigned to take on our image and likeness to save us. I gaze in wonder at the beauty of family. Finally, I am filled with gratitude by Our Lord’s bountiful gifts to all of us.

    Merry Christmas!

  7. Thank you for sharing your heart with us! I love this time of year and the celebrations but Jesus is everything. God has removed the distractions so that we can experience the joy and peace only He can give to us. I feel His presence and comfort more and more each day without the noise. I don’t think I would have if He hadn’t taken me to this quiet place.
    God bless you dear Kay for all that you do.
    God’s richest blessings to you and your beautiful family,

  8. Thank you for your lovely inspirational post Kay. I admire your courage. Christ is the true meaning of Christmas. I too am a pastors wife and I enjoy your daily posts very much.
    Bless you and Merry Christmas.

  9. What a beautiful expression of your faith. Thanks for sharing your heart that others may know where our love, peace, hope and joy are found. It’s a blessing that Christmas will be quieter this year so we may “be still” and focus on that precious babe born to be our Savior. Knowing that we can trust God in all He promises gives great peace in this uncertain time. May His Grace bless your Christmas and shine throughout the New Year ahead!

  10. Hi Kay,

    Thank you for sharing what Christmas means to you.

    New Year’s Day fell on a Sunday in 1989. I had been living a broken and deeply sinful life. I was surrounded by Christians at work and I saw that they had something I wanted. I saw their joy, hope and purity, I saw Jesus in them but I thought I had gone too far for Him to forgive me.

    So it was on Sunday and New Year’s Day in 1989 that I went to church. I heard about the cross and how I could have a new life, forgiveness and eternal life through Christ, just like people look forward to a new year. I prayed to accept Him as my Lord and Savior. Life hasn’t been easy, but He has sustained me through everything.

    That’s what Christmas means to me, His birth, sinless life, sacrificial death and resurrection to make a way for me to know Him and all the promises God has for me.

    It’s a wonderful time of year to share and witness about Him too. Yes, we are missing family and celebrating Christmas, but I’m celebrating Him all year long.

    God bless you,

    Beth Harris

    1. Wow. Thank you for your honesty and for being so open. Your words really spoke to my heart today. Isn’t it amazing how God forgives us? I have lived in the past as the biggest sinner. I didn’t see how He could ever forgive me, but He does. For that I’m eternally grateful. Thank you for saying what you did Beth!

  11. Thank you Kay for sharing this! I too thank and praise the Lord 365 days a year for sending His son to save us. His mercy and kindness to us amazes me every day! I thank him for you too! I’ve learned so much from your blog and I’m trying to b a better dressed influencer ?

  12. Thank you, Kay, for sharing your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. So often, good things come out of trials, if we just look for it; and perhaps one of those good things will be slowing ourselves down, not letting the usual holiday distractions, stress, and fatigue set in. We won’t be having our usual Christmas family get together, due to 5 grandchildren who will be home from college—along with their germs! But we’re all so fortunate to have Zoom and FaceTime to connect, so it will be fine. Let’s focus on our blessings and not be sad at this joyous time of year. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and joy and peace to all!

  13. I’ve just been given a miracle. My husband has been in ICU for awhile now from a heart attack. They moved him to a room today, he is doing great, This is a great gift and sure straightened out my priorities fast. Christmas is about love. The Fathers and the love we have for our family.
    Thank you Kay for this post & have a wonderful Christmas. You are a blessing.

  14. How precious to always be honorable with your forum and influence, and not hide your light under a bushel, Kay! It is our privilege and responsibility to represent HIM well, especially as the days grow darker. You have been such a darling to me, and I pray you and James continue to be blessed in your endeavors. Merriest Christmas to you, as we continue this truly miraculous week!

  15. Loved your post, thanks for the reminder ! We cannot be together in person, but we will be in spirit this year.

  16. Kay, Thank you for this beautiful post! Jesus is the Lord! He was God with flesh and bones! We must keep our eyes on Him always! Your inner beauty post are my favorite!

  17. Thank you Kay for your beautiful message today. Yes, Jesus is the reason for this wonderful season and our lives are blessed that you are such a wonderful ambassador for Christ.

    Wishing you and your family a blessed and wonderful Christmas!

  18. Hi Kay…..I very much enjoyed this post.

    Christ is the meaning of Christmas and I am so happy to be a part of his coming. I have been a sick person all my life, one thing to another and I know I don’t look sick in any of my posts. Right now I am doing ok??. I know he has kept me here on earth for a reason, which I may never know why……my husband says it’s because God knows he couldn’t live without me❤️. I will be ready when he calls me home one day.

    Christmas was so very special when my 2 sisters and me were growing up. My Mom went to be with the Lord in 2014 and Christmas is not the same without her. She made Christmas special.

    Love and Blessings to you and James,
    Merry Christmas ?

  19. Thank you for shining the light of Jesus birth to those of us who read your blog. May our lights so shine before men that they will want to know Him and His love for mankind. In these uncertain times, we need to shine our lights and let others know the blessed Hope through Jesus.

  20. Thank you Kay for your heartfelt conviction of the true meaning of Christmas. I am relatively new to your blog so I appreciate the inner beauty in you as you share styling tips which have been helpful to me. As a Catholic I love the Advent Wreath on my table with the four candles representing the four weeks preparing for the Light of God coming into the world. I hope you have a blessed Christmas and peaceful New Year!

  21. Thank you Kay for the beautiful meaning of Christmas. I have also read all the comments from everyone else in the post and there is such love pouring out. This is the true meaning of Christmas, Jesus and all His love for us and what we should be showing everyone. I too miss the get togethers at church with the group and will miss Christmas Eve service this year.
    We will be getting together on Christmas Eve with some of our family for supper . We have to be grateful for that.
    Will not be the big get together with the whole family, my parents are no longer here on earth, so that too has changed in the past few years. I will always remember the games and fun we all had together, but we should be grateful for the loved ones we do have and the joy of celebrating the birth of our Lord, Jesus.
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone!

  22. Kay, I love this post and appreciate you sharing your views on Christmas. We share the same approach to the holiday and I love your talented writing. Actually I love everything about you and your blog. I love your classic style and down to earth honesty and approach to everything. Keep up the good work and Merry Christmas to you and your family.